It would seem that the Dose can no longer completely ignore the Christopher Young ‘thing’ — Lizz Winstead opened with it last night — but I’ll be damned if I ever put a picture of that guy on our front page. Instead I give you the new Bieber-licious Tom Brady who appears to be wearing his helmet to the barbershop. (Thanks to Dose reader, Nic, who saw Rhode Island once again make the national news (ABC) for all the wrong reasons.)

[Additional Note: Since my posting of this item another editor has overridden my 'Depictions of Christopher Young' ban and inserted one below. I don't think I was wrong. BC]

The voting deadline for The Providence Phoenix ‘The Best 2010′ poll has been extended until March 18th. Pick your favorites in the various and sundry food, drink, entertainment and arts categories. (The fragmentation within these categories is getting a little ridicolous — wiener joint and wiener/hot dog joint?)

Having said that, under ‘City Life’ you will find the ‘Best Blog’ category and even if we here at The Dose act all too-cool-for-school, we are actually horribly needy and insecure, and in constant need of stroking and validation, and would really love to win this honor. . . again. The other nominees are worthy enough — although there are a few glaring omissions — but just vote for us. Pleeeeeeze.

(Um, also, go to ‘Place for Coffee’ and vote for Blue State Coffee.)

I know the show is egregiously horrible and signals the end of modern civilization, if not our entire species, but it’s impossible not to like this guy.

If you answered, “Must Be Santa” give yourself a star (we also would have accepted Hunter Thompson as a correct answer).  And then be sure to check out this new straight-up weird Bob Dylan music video for his Christmas song of the same name.

It’s quite hard to say at first what to make of this song/video, but as an avid Dylan listener, I’ll try to expound.  First thought is that this puts to rest any doubt that Dylan’s main artistic purpose in life these days is to be as unpredictable and odd as possible.  But for a person who for some time now I’ve assumed to be loveless, cynical, and fairly contemptuous of his fame, this video also exhibits Dylan’s weird sense of humor and appreciation for the absurd.

I mean, the guy is wearing a ridiculous wig (either that or he’s been conking his Jew-curls straight) under a series of hats the whole video, including a Santa hat, which takes place at a raucous X-mas house party, possibly in the 1950’s.  And the entire song is just drums, accordion, and Dylan and a chorus singing children’s lyrics about Santa, at one point with the singing of the names of Santa’s reindeers with the names of the Presidents since Eisenhower interspersed (curiously, he ends at Clinton).

Then of course there’s the matter of what it means that Dylan–the once-proclaimed spokesperson for a generation who made a career out of criticizing American society, including its consumer culture, and who is also Jewish–has just put out an entire Christmas album.  But I guess that’s exactly the point: it doesn’t mean anything.  Anybody who tries to read any meaning into this song or video would be a fool.  Even Dylan can have some fun, especially if it’s at the expense of making his hardcore fans ask, WTF?

The Upper Crust have given Providence a special mention in anticipation of their show tonight.

Lying midway between Boston and New York, it was only a matter of time before the Upper Crust would stumble upon this small but congenial city, which—while considerably smaller than its better-known neighbors—would be considered a great metropolis in comparison to many European cities at the height of the Bubonic Plague in the early 14th Century.
Indeed, there are many reasons to love Providence, besides its convenient location, which (as previously noted) is neither here nor there, but somewhere in between; and close enough, as they say, for Rocque and Roll. . . my fondest wish is that you will attend, as there is no reasonable excuse for not doing so, given the undeniable vicinity of the place to every other place nearby, so that it is almost impossible to get from one place to another without tripping over it. . .

Well, you get the idea. (They have an old friend in this city.) Their recent appearance playing ‘We’re Finished with Finishing School’ on The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson after the jump.

$10, 9pm, Friday, Jerky’s, 71 Richmond Street

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The movie ‘10′ was tagged “a comedy for adults who can count”. Yeah, we could use more of those. From the Money & Markets column in yesterday’s Providence Journal, a Thomson Reuters item starts, “We have just four months left until the end of the decade.” Say what? The last year of a ten-year period is the tenth year, right?  The decade will end December 31st, 2010. (Poor Bo, turns out her braids were too tight and she turned into a Republican.)

Providence Roller Derby presents PRD Beach Party this Saturday, August 1st at Firehouse 13. Limbo, drink specials and a swimsuit contest!

$5, 9pm, Saturday, Firehouse 13, 41 Central St, Providence

Just eleven days to go until IndieArts Festival downtown.  For the second year in a row, I’ll be judging the General Burnside Facial Hair Contest.  We’ll be filling you in with details as we get closer to the event, unless we forget to like with SoundSession, but this is just a heads-up in case you needed the time to grow something special.

If her hair is blue, she’s at work — if it’s pink, she’s performing. Roz Raskin inadvertantly got herself some free press when (unbeknownst to her) she crossed paths with a ProJo reporter who dubbed her the ‘girl with the blue hair’. Roz had served her at Blue State Coffee and made such an impact that the meeting ended up becoming not one, but two columns by Rita Lussier. Roz is just one of those special fun people and she has a fantastic voice. Roz Raskin and the Ricecakes perform tonight at AS220 with Slow Drive and the Classical High School Band(?).

$6, 8pm, Sunday, AS220, 115 Empire Street

The longest line at Saturday’s RISD Student Art Sale was for the caricatures — or as the lady behind me was saying “Look, characters! I want to get my character done”.  The talented artist is Ivy, a RISD sophomore, who worked pretty quickly (and will do parties and bar mitzvahs). Also a hit were the $5 haircuts which I guess were a sort of ephemeral performance art (although probably not nearly ephemeral enough). More pix and Ivy’s contact info after the jump.

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Tonight you have a chance to witness homegrown local rock. Really. Check out the Rhode Island College Battle of the Bands at Firehouse 13, starting time 8pm. RIC students get in for $3 dollars with their IDs — the rest of us get in for $5. The line up looks like this: Roz Raskin and the Rice Cakes, Mowgli, The Glass Jars and Saturday Night Live. [RR video after the jump]

8pm, Tuesday, $5, Firehouse 13, 41 Central Street

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Okay I know that this has already been mentioned but I am just reminding everyone out there that tonight at Firehouse 13 Japanther, What Cheer? Brigade, Ninjasonik, and Math The Band will be performing. Japanther (a super nice drum and guitar and loop duo/ardent Proviphiles) happen to be one of my all time favorite live shows, and What Cheer? Brigade is a damn close second. Check it out!

$8, 8pm, Firehouse 13, 41 Central Street, off Elmwood Avenue

Please join us for an exciting event tomorrow, Wednesday, March 18th at Brown University’s Sayles Hall (located on the Main Green). From 10-4, stylists-in-training from the Paul Mitchell hairstyling school in Cranston, RI will be giving heavily discounted haircuts (suggested donation $5-$10) to benefit Wigs for Kids, a non-profit organization that collects donations of hair and money to create individualized wigs for children who have experienced medical hair loss due to illnesses and treatments.

EVERYONE is welcome to come to Sayles Hall to either get a regular, cheap trim to benefit charity or to donate 12″ of clean, dry, non-color-treated hair directly to Wigs for Kids.

***You don’t need to donate hair or have an appointment to participate!***