You heard it here first! And by here, I mean the New York Times, which leads this snappy piece on McCain’s pervasive influence over one of his favorite past-times - legally dropping thousands of dollars on the roll of the dice - with a vignette of the maverick from gambletown in his natural environment: surrounded by high roller lobbyists at a private craps table at Foxwoods:

Senator John McCain was on a roll. In a room reserved for high-stakes gamblers at the Foxwoods Resort Casino in Connecticut, he tossed $100 chips around a hot craps table. When the marathon session ended around 2:30 a.m., the Arizona senator and his entourage emerged with thousands of dollars in winnings.

While this article is pure gold simply for referring to McCain as a “lifelong/high-stakes gambler,” thereby reinforcing the image of the senator (pictured here at a Bellagio craps table) drunkenly gambling America’s future away like the deed to one of his many, many houses, there’s also some good reporting here on how the Indian gaming industry came to be, and to be so powerful. Turns out McCain’s played a big role, taking favors, and directions, from plenty of unseemly lobbyists along the way, many of whom are still big-time supporters and advisers.

Mr. McCain was betting at a casino he oversaw as a member of the Senate Indian Affairs Committee, and he was doing so with the lobbyist who represents that casino, according to three associates of Mr. McCain.

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Sarah Palin, the ex-beauty queen turned small-town mayor turned GOP VP Pick, is a goldmine. From the video of her sportscasting days, to all kinds of ridiculous photos, to various and hilarious quotes on topics like the pledge of allegiance ( “If it was good enough for the founding fathers it’s good enough for me” ) to the Vice Presidency ( “Someone needs to tell me what the vice-president does” ) to Iraq. Oh, and then there’s her seeming affiliation with the creepy/secessionist Alaska Independance Party. Oh, and the fact that she’s under investigation for improperly firing state troopers. Oh yeah, wait, she also ran a soft money group for indicted Alaska Senator Ted “Series of Tubes” Stevens.

The bottom line: Beneath the bald exploitation of passing over many more qualified GOP women (Hello! Kay Bailey Hutchinson!) and choosing a completely inexperienced and seemingly unvetted yahoo from Alaska, there is something fundamentally McCain about the decision.

McCain, you see, is a gambler. Not a poker player a la Barack Obama. McCain, like many a rich white man with a flashy, impulsive streak and poor judgment, likes to shoot craps

This being said (and you can read more about how McCain is a hardcore gambling addict in this excellent TIME piece from this week), it appears his current gamble is getting dicier and dicier by the day.

Not 72 hours after he named Sarah Palin as his VP pick, the Palins are announcing that their 17 year old daughter Bristol is preggo, and will marry the father in a shotgun wedding, presumably some time before the election.

HOLY CRAP! After the jump, the many reasons why this is significant. more »

On my way to work each morning, I walk past the Attorney General’s office on South Main Street, and I never tire of giggling at the building’s inscription:

With great power comes great responsibility. — Stan Lee

Yesterday, it seems, this motto received more than mere lip service when special assistant AG Molly K. Cote managed to prove two ACI guards—Former Capt. Gualter Botas and former Lt. Kenneth Viveiros—guilty on charges of assaulting four inmates.

The ProJo reports:

Yesterday’s verdicts, which culminated an 18-day trial before Superior Court Judge Daniel A. Procaccini, came after jurors had deliberated for less than four hours over the course of two days.

Afterward, state corrections Director A.T. Wall issued a statement that began with a quote from former President Theodore Roosevelt: “No man is above the law and no man is beneath it.”

“These two former correctional officers have now been held accountable in a court of law for their abuse of inmates entrusted to their custody,” Wall said. “They do not represent the staff of this department. In fact, through their actions, they have dishonored the 1,500 men and women who perform their jobs with pride, professionalism and integrity every day. These men and women do a very difficult job, and they do it without breaking the law.”

Their charges are misdemeanors, carrying a maximum sentence of up to one year in prison. Can you imagine the fate of an inmate convicted of beating inmates? Botas and Viveiros have yet to be sentenced, but each, rightly, has been fired by the Department of Corrections.

Some reviewers have been comparing Heath Ledger’s Joker to the Droogs of Clockwork Orange. But I was suddenly reminded of another favorite movie baddie during my second viewing of The Dark Knight — Luther, the gleefully maniacal leader of the Rogues, from the 1979 movie The Warriors.  It takes nothing away from Heath Ledger’s performance to acknowledge the demented and unhinged wing-nuts who paved the way.

[youtube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=emY42W70zZU]

With the R Kelly child pornography/teen golden showers trials twisting and turning on the daily, let’s step back and recognize that no one makes a self aggrandizing remix like Robert Sylvester Kelly. Money quote in this remix of the Dream’s Shorty is the shit: “I’m Kellz bitch go figure.”

Hat tip to Andrew. My cover of the dream is after the jump. more »

…if the world knew just how often this tune ran through its brain:

[youtube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ALHybzqaWwg]

Why do I still use Hotmail?

It’s official: Women, consider yourselves liberated. Today MSN is insistent that its millions of email-checkers learn about ‘The Wife’s Bill of Rights’.

Amendment I
We have the right to dislike your buddies.

Amendment II
We have the right to experience PMS in all its glory.

Amendment III
We have the right to demand you finish a household job.

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Still no evidence of real change.   According to today’s New York Times (and the hard copy of the ProJo) the Pope is “‘ashamed’ by priest abuse”. Then why is Cardinal Bernard law still working for the Vatican, a position to which he was elevated by John Paul II following Law’s illustrious performance in the running of the Boston diocese? Law should have been defrocked, excommunicated and arrested. But it was the new Pope himself who urged secrecy and wheel-spinning in his former position as advisor to JPII. The Guardian had this to say regarding a letter written in 2001 by Mr. Ratzinger — his advice on how to handle the pedophilia allegations.

I can’t believe I missed this in the New York Times yesterday:

 ”Possible Nazi Theme of Grand Prix Boss’s Orgy Draws Calls to Quit”

 In a sublimely perverse, supremely hilarious article that at first glance seems like something ripped straight from the Onion, the Times reports on Max Mosley, president of a formula one governing body, who was recently revealed to have participated in “a depraved Nazi sadomasochistic orgy” with five prostitutes in London’s Chelsea district.

According to the Times:

The video showed Mr. Mosley counting in German — “Eins! Zwei! Drei! Vier! Funf!” — as he used a leather strap to lash one of the women.

“She needs more of ze punishment!” he cried in German-accented English. One woman appeared to search his hair for lice while another called off items on an inspection list.

 But, wait–it gets better:

Family history has added to the notoriety: Mr. Mosley, 67, is the younger son of Britain’s 1930s fascist leader, Sir Oswald Mosley, and the society beauty Diana Mitford, whose secret wedding in Berlin in October 1936 was held at the home of the Nazi propaganda chief Joseph Goebbels and included Hitler as a guest of honor.

Read the full story here.

Opposition claims Zimbabwe election victory; Robert Mugabe mum with the “official count” still secret.

Keith Richards is too high to write autobiography, remember life.

Saudi Prince plans mile-high tower in Jeddah. Tower-of-Babel jokes not OK. Penis jokes inevitable.

Russia wants to build a tunnel from Siberia to Alaska, mostly to export their cave-dwelling, anti-credit card and processed food doomsday cult.

As the Olympic torch sets off from Tiananmen Square, German Chancellor Angela Merkel says she’ll boycott the Beijing Games.

Turkish Supreme Court to hear case “to ban the President, Prime Minister and the country’s ruling party on grounds that they’re threatening the constitutionally-mandated secular basis of the state.” Now that’s separation of church and state.

The Boston Globe chimes in, with this hard-hitting piece on the butler shortage, now approaching critical levels:

There are no official statistics on the high-end domestic service industry, but Charles MacPherson, president of his own placement and consulting agency and former head of the International Guild of Professional Butlers, has declared a nationwide butler shortage.

“It is such an issue that our firm has decided to open a butler and household management school to help offset the lack of supply,” he said. “There are more millionaires and billionaires in the world today, and though there is not a shortage, per se, of people to work in the homes, what’s missing is qualified people.”

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Projo’s got it:

A teenager allegedly threw a Molotov cocktail outside a long-vacant Jewish temple in South Providence early yesterday, but the police caught him and two of his apparent accomplices. The teens apparently intended to toss the Molotov cocktail into a vacant lot across the street from the temple in order to enjoy the sight of it shattering and flaming, but it was hastily cast aside onto the grass outside the temple when a police cruiser approached, the police said.

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With all the $1 million offers to pose for this and that magazine being thrown around, lets remember that Jersey Girl Ashley’s most prized asset, the movie rights, are still out there. It could be a grittier, seedier, 21st century version of Almost Famous. Feeling it? No? Ok.

America’s favorite past-time (no, not $1000/hr prostitutes) has taken yet another hit recently, this time in Rhode Island’s heartland, Cumberland. An alleged swindler had allegedly bilked 11 Northern RI families out of some $35,000 after he claimed to be a former minor league players with connections to the Baltimore Orioles.

Heartbreaking aspect number one: this dude secured loans from local parents to help him start the “Field of Dreams Baseball Academy,” a scheme at which one must gasp for its cruel exploitation of a heartwarming story about lost youth and the great game to steal from hardworking Cumberlanders. Heartbreaking aspect number two: He has been doing this all across the country.

There is no joy in Mudville, or the Blackstone Valley in this case, for this dude. more »

I’m even more excited than before about the Wolverine movie now that they have finally decided to include Gambit, who was mysteriously absent from the first three X-Men movies  even though he’s wicked awesome. I’m so excited I’m totally going to overlook the fact that the actor that’s gonna play him looks like a big something that rhymes with shmouchebag–although I’ve never seen Friday Night Lights or Snakes On A Plane so I can’t confirm that.

Finally, an X-Men movie without stupid Halle Berry trying to be meaningful and emotive and Oscar-worthy! From the director of the came-out-on-DVD-today Rendition! (via io9)