Weekend Contest

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In their most recent bulletin (PDF), Citizens Against Trafficking told a story about a guy who allegedly got a nasty rash while at one of the spas in town. Apparently the guy mentioned his affliction on a message board, warning others to stay away and wondering what to say to his new girlfriend.

Citizens Against Trafficking had some advice:  “Citizens Against Trafficking strongly advises the new girlfriend to find another boyfriend!”

Anyway, that’s the most exciting part of the newsletter, except for the totally insane footnote at the end of the article, wherein the anti-Megan Andelloux advocates ask for some advice of their own:

Note on the use of the term “john”: Some people, particularly men who are named John, object to referring to men who buy sex by the slang term “john.” Citizens Against Trafficking understands this, but we refuse to give them legitimacy by calling them “clients” or “customers.” Please help us come up with another name for these offenders. We need a unique term like batterer, molester, or rapist for the act of using a woman or child in prostitution.

Aside from light-heartedly joking about rape, which no one was talking about, and children, which no one was talking about, the CAT people do have a good point. We don’t want to upset all the people named John out there; I mean, after all, they already have that whole toilet slang to deal with, right?  So how can we talk about people who buy services from someone else, but without using the words “client” or “customer”?  It’s kind of like playing Taboo!

Leave your suggestions in the comments; the best entry by Monday morning won’t actually win anything, but we will go out of our way to tell everyone how neat we think you are.