Salt Lake City Nixes Romney The Businessman

mormon undies A final plea to the aging, white males who want to see the successful businessman in the White House, please heed Bill Maher’s recent warning about who you will be going to bed with.

When you’re electing Mitt, you aren’t just electing him. You’re electing every right-wing nut he’s pandered to in the last ten years. If the “Mitt-mobile” does roll into Washington, it’ll be towing behind it the whole anti-intellectual, anti-science freak show: the abstinence obsessives, the flat-earthers, home-schoolers, holy warriors, the anti-women social Neanderthals, the closeted homosexuals, and every end-timer who sees the Virgin Mary in the grass over the septic tank.

Romney has proven to be an astute businessman when it comes to his own portfolio but displays little acumen regarding the federal budget. And eldest Romney son, Tagg, and his private-equity firm Solamere Capital, just can’t wait to empty the latter into the former via government contracts (defense contractors, fracking concerns, for-profit colleges). The recent Providence Journal editorial on this topic noted,

Solamere touts its “access to compelling opportunities.” Indeed.

(Also read Froma Harrop’s excellent piece — 11.4.12.)

More after the jump.

But perhaps Romney has a plan for these fundamentalist tools down in Washington; think of the Saudi royal family who once redirected the anger of the frustrated, unemployed, male masses by making a deal with the Wahhabi clerics (can you say anti-intellectual? anti-science? anti-women?). Following some significant signs of unrest, the Saudi power elite made these religious fundamentalists the morality police and put them in charge of education, pumping millions into their madrassas. The money kept flowing as long as the indoctrination deflected attention away from the economic depredations of the royal family and onto America. But Romney doesn’t have to spend a dime, he can just let congressional republicans and Fox News keep the masses worked up over the gays, immigrants, and evolution, while he tends to . . . business.

So before you get into bed with Mitt Romney (and this picture is, by the way, what the potential leader of the free world wears to bed every night . . . and all day long) remember, this is a zero sum game; if Solamere wins, we lose. One last thought — The Salt Lake Tribune has endorsed Obama.

2 thoughts on “Salt Lake City Nixes Romney The Businessman”

  1. I certainly don’t need to wait to 2016. I am an atheist and I find all these theologies and practices ridiculous. I regard the man actually nailing himself to a cross on Good Friday (the Philippines) and the Jewish woman wearing a wig over her perfectly beautiful hair on a hot summer day (New York City) with equal disdain. Issues of judgment are important when it comes to being the President, so extreme or irrational behavior is to be considered. I thought the magic underpants reflected poorly on the man’s judgment. This is the 21st century, we know what causes thunder now; we should be guided by science, not myth and superstition. One problem is, these customs can be dangerous. Please read the recent NYT article about the transmission of herpes to baby boys by mohels during ritual circumcision. Hold onto your stomach — during this form of the ritual the mohel places the baby’s penis in his mouth and sucks the blood off. Since 2000, eleven babies have contracted herpes and two of them have died. (I have taken on the Catholic church on numerous occasions and will again don’t worry.)

  2. To the end ...

    Ms. Comery,

    Yet again, you included an irrelevant joke about Mormons in a piece about Mitt Romney. I was as glad as anyone to see him lose yesterday, but I simply don’t understand why you feel it necessary to mock the man’s religious beliefs.

    He’s a Mormon, I get it. They have some beliefs and practices that seem odd to non-Mormons. So what? I don’t care what kind of underwear my elected officials wear; I care about how they govern.

    So here’s my question to you: If the GOP nominates a Jewish candidate for President in 2016, do you plan on making jokes about yamulkes and kosher food? If they nominate a Catholic, will you make fun of transubstantiation? If your answer is “no,” please explain to me why that’s different from cracking jokes about Mitt’s underwear.

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